so, last week i read this interesting article from corrine on frock & roll about insecurity & where it stems from. her conclusion was from other people. out of experience, i couldn’t help but concur.
someone commented that she COMPLETELY blamed the media with their “impossibly thin and hopelessly perfect, unrealistic women” & claimed that it was time to embrace “REAL women,” you know the supposedly imperfect ones with meat on their bones. well, that defiant ignorance pissed me off so much, i ran out of space ranting in the comment box.
okay, well not literally. but it became so long, it could’ve been an article. & then i of course realized “hey, this could be an article! i have my own goddamn blog.” so, instead of flaming the hell out of that poor, probably otherwise very decent girl, i decided to write this. *ahem*
let me start by asking you where you think your insecurities about your body come from. really think about it.
i’ll bet my fabulous new sewing machine that at least most of them come from other people in your environment. probably from family members or friends/schoolmates innocently teasing you or just trying to hurt you, which a lot of small people tend to do. have you ever paid any attention to how pretty someone else was compared to you before your childish self-confidence took that blow? i didn’t think so. why would you have, right? why would anyone who doesn’t have the utmost confidence in themselves & their looks ever compare themselves to other people around them or on tv or in magazines?
of course, the person who has the utmost confidence in themselves & their looks is a rare one indeed. & everyone else does compare themselves to other people, including those in the media. i believe it’s a symptom, not the cause of anything. sure, it doesn’t help that there are so many “impossibly thin and hopelessly perfect, unrealistic” people in the media, flanked by advice on how to become like them, but still, symptom.
soooooo many people blame the media for physical insecurities & eating disorders, but i think that’s as silly as blaming marilyn manson for columbine. it’s merely, unfortunate, fuel for a fire that’s already blazing. besides, physical insecurities & eating disorders existed waaaaaaayyyyy before the media dominated by “impossibly thin and hopelessly perfect, unrealistic” people.
why not start saying positive things (& only positive things!) about other people, instead of finding a scapegoat? you’d be surprised what a difference that could make in a person’s life. here’s an example of what you should nevereverevereverevereverevereverEVER say to a child insecure about their looks: “well, sweetie, you just have more things to work on than other people.” try “what the hell are you talking about? you’re beautiful the way you are. & that acne? it’s only temporary, you shouldn’t worry about it so much. it’s nothing your radiant smile won’t cast in the shadows.”
but back to the media for a second. have you ever spared a thought to think of what those “impossibly thin and hopelessly perfect, unrealistic” people think of themselves? those people that spend more than half their lives just desperately maintaining their supposed perfection? those that get passed a cigarette when they complain that they’re hungry, because the sample size 0 clothes are the slightest bit too tight on them? those who never see an un-retouched picture of themselves go to print, because whatever the masses may claim, they’re not perfect enough? those that get rejected for jobs simply because there was a “prettier” candidate? those that regularly get yelled at to “oh my god, eat a cow, ya twig!” by complete strangers? those that are mercilessly criticized on their looks by the other people working in the media? & those consuming the media? how would you feel if you were one of them?
i honestly think those “impossibly thin and hopelessly perfect, unrealistic women*” are the real victims of the media. & i think it’s preposterous that it’s become so socially acceptable to trash those “impossibly thin and hopelessly perfect, unrealistic women*” purely because of their looks. & the same people who do, get mortally offended when someone calls them out for being fat! are you kidding me?
& then of course, there are those ignorant people that only consider curvy, ‘imperfect’ women “REAL.” uhm, who are they to decide that those “impossibly thin and hopelessly perfect, unrealistic women*” are not real women? obviously, they are female & exist. what other criteria do you need?
*only referring specifically to women here, because it’s more fitting in this area. not because i think male models/actors are left completely untouched by the industry they work in or whatever, because i don’t think that.
& please share this article if you liked it :] i’d love to hear your thoughts on this subject as well.